Tuesday, February 8, 2011

Discurbing Development

Call me curious, but when the city posts a seven foot sign in front of my house, I feel compelled to read it. Notification of Midtown "streetscape" improvements. Evidently even gay neighborhoods let their vanity get the better of them as they mature and wonder if their bushes might be detracting from their other points of interest. Unike myself however, this kind of 'scaping needs more than steady nerves, electric trimmers, disposable razors, two hand mirrors and scrotal styptic.

The first "improvement" was to cut down and chip the old established trees along the street from here to the park. Along with a great deal of noise, this made the sidewalks look unnaturally bare. No matter, the sidewalks are coming up anyway for utility work. Meanwhile traffic is reduced to a single lane in each direction, making the morning commute just that much more of a delight. Yesterday it took me ten minutes just to pull out of the driveway. And not all the lanes will be coming back since part of the road surface is being sacrificed to make room for wider sidewalks, parking spaces and new trees to replace the old trees.

Just like my own grooming projects, there may be some discomfort, chafing and a prayer it'll worth it by swimsuit season.

Welcome to the neighborhood! Go back where you came from.

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