Monday, April 1, 2013

Jesus, Take The Wheel!

With the recent momentum behind marriage equality and last week's historic Supreme Court hearings, some of the nuttier fringe of the religious right are getting their lather extra whipped:
All hyperbole works better with Dramatic Chipmunk.

"The homosexual lobby is on the verge of a historic victory. The potential consequences will be calamitous for democracy and the family... Traditional America will be smashed — probably forever."
Duh duh duh! It continues...
"Their lifestyles and behaviors inevitably lead to a culture of death ... Homosexual behavior — for example, sodomy — is unnatural and immoral."
I like how he singles out only one example of "homosexual behavior" – sodomy – leaving out other behaviors such as interior design, nighttime moisturizing and power-ballad karaoke, which are arguably every bit as unnatural.

As usual, whenever I hear one of these asshats telling me my "lifestyle" is dangerous, I like to point out their lifestyle choice ain't so heathy either. That's why I felt it was time for another installment of a recurring feature I like to call, "HOLY SHIT LOOKOUT!!!"

Very tragic indeed. But what the Lord taketh, He gives back in 24-point font.
This has to the most redundant headline ever. I think its safe to say everyone on
that bus (with the exception of the innocent children) was a believer,
which is what put them in harm's way in the first place.
Perhaps they left out the word "still"?

Bus Crash Kills 24 in South Africa

Atlanta Black Star-Mar 15, 2013 — A church bus carrying over 60 passengers crashed in South Africa's ... Reuters reports that 44 passengers were hurt in the accident.

Police: Paroled sex offender was riding in church bus with children

Evansville Courier & Press-Mar 11, 2013 — At the time of his original arrest in 1996, prosecutors suspected ... of Albion, Rosenbower was caught riding on a church bus with small children.

11 hurt when church van rolls over on I-65 south of Birmingham

The Decatur Daily-Mar 10, 2013 CALERA (AP) — Eleven people are recovering from injuries after their church van rolled over on Interstate 65 in Calera. The accident ...

Mob hit man who led Boy Scout troop while working as a contract ...

Daily Mail - Mar 17, 2013 — A convicted mob hit man who led a Boy Scout troop while still a killer says he's living for God now and volunteers his time driving a church bus ...

Church van crash: 'It's a miracle from God that nobody died' (blog)-Mar 10, 2013 — BIRMINGHAM, Alabama -- Church-goers at the Worship & Deliverance Ministries in Ensley this morning celebrated and praised God after a ...

Driver in fatal church van crash now facing federal robbery charges

WBIR-TV-Mar 6, 2013 — A Seymour man facing charges in a deadly church van crash has now been indicted on federal robbery charges. ... The wreck killed youth leader Jeff Trussell and 16-year-old Courteney Kaliszewski. Ten others were injured.

6 month anniversary of church van crash

WBIR-TV-Mar 16, 2013 — The crashed injured 10 and killed two Cedar Grove Baptist Church ... were returning from a weekend youth retreat when the crash happened.

Driver who crashed head-on with a church van pleads not guilty to ...

Maryville Daily Times-Mar 20, 2013 — Several other youth were also injured in the crash. ... released from the hospital after the crash, in which he was allegedly high on bath salts.

Several injured in two-vehicle crash in Paducah

WPSD Local 6-Mar 21, 2013 — No one was seriously injured during a two vehicle crash at a Downtown ... Officers say a white church van traveling east on 6th Street slammed ...

Memorial will commemorate 10th anniversary of Dalton Mesarchik's ...

Bloomington Pantagraph-Mar 22, 2013 — Her son was waiting for a church van outside his home on March 26, 2003 ... Authorities said he was killed ...

Screening dates set for Carrollton bus crash documentary

WAVE-Mar 21, 2013 — Twenty-seven people were killed and dozens of others were injured in the crash after Larry Mahoney drove his pick-up truck the wrong way on ...

Former church bus driver accused of molesting youth group...

The Australian - Jul 27, 2010 — A church bus driver sexually molested children as they sat on his lap while he drove them to and from youth group activities, NSW police allege.

Church van struck by allegedly drunk driver in LA - San...

San Jose Mercury News - Feb 11, 2012 — Authorities say 11 people were injured when the church van they were in was struck by an allegedly drunk driver in Los Angeles.


$2.95 - Buffalo News - Aug 15, 2002 — Five people suffered potentially serious injuries Wednesday when a church van, driven by a teenager and carrying children, went off the Niagara Thruway in the ...


  1. At first I thought it said, "Bus Crash Survivor Believes He Is A God."

    1. I'm still amazed how the writer thought it necessary and appropriate to describe how the survivors "clawed their way to safety over the dead". Seriously? If the victims have claw marks, can we be sure it was the crash that did them in?

  2. In the same "whipped" article, that nutcase states, "Marriage is the basic institution of society. Its very definition (and essence) is the sacred union between a man and a woman. Its fundamental aim — and the reason for centuries it has held a special status in Western civilization — is to produce, raise and socialize children. It is the social conveyor belt by which one generation is passed on to the next. Destroy the family, and with it goes the glue holding society together." "Produce . . . social conveyor belt," wow what a depressing way to view the role of "family." As a man who loves - yes physically - both men and women and who has "produced" amazing children - i can't help but wonder who did the colossal mind fuck on this dude to "produce" such an unloving, twisted individual. I'd seriously feel sorry for him if he wasnt such a complete asshole. Good post.